Polygamy: Would You Do It?
This morning, I was reading an article by a colleague. It alluded to the recent decision by the U.S. Supreme Court to allow same-sex marriage eventually leading to the legalization of polygamous marriages. Could you enter such an arrangement? I know I couldn't. Here are 10 reasons why.
10 Reasons Why Polygamy Isn't for Me
- I barely have the time to entertain ONE man. So, I know I couldn't give my attention to more than one. In the case of being one of multiple wives to one man, he'd eventually cut me from the team, seeing no reason for me to be there. Hey, if she's handling business, why should I?
- Should any children be born to this union, I wouldn't want any of MY money going to another woman's child. Neither would I want another woman chastising mine. And if I had two husbands, I would expect them to feel the same way. This means the one who is not the father would leave the situation. But if he happened to stay and loved the child I made with the other husband as his own and the father allowed it, I'd see both men as punks and wouldn't want either.
- I don't have time for in-home competition.
- I wouldn't cook for anyone but my children and myself. And if it was a case of me having two husbands, I wouldn't know which one to serve first. (See No. 3.) In addition, I'd only wash my kids' and my clothes and dishes. Yes, I CAN be low down.
- I don't have the energy to sleep with two men regularly..... Anymore. *insert side eye* Hey! I'm not going to lie like I've never had two boyfriends at once, but 1) they didn't know about each other and 2) balancing got to be too stressful. Living with TWO men and sleeping with both of them regularly? No can do. (Again, see No. 3.)
- I wouldn't want my children to live that way. Therefore, I cannot live such an example before them.
- And have my momma lose respect for me? I don't care WHO (other than God) doesn't like me. When your MOMMA doesn't like you, you're in bad shape.
- How are community property laws observed in such arrangements? I KNOW I wouldn't be in it long, and I want to take ALL of mine with me when I leave!
- Adapting to living with ONE other adult is difficult enough.
- Kings and queens don't share their thrones or authority. There can only be one head of household. (For the last time, see No. 3.)
I know of a few women who say they know their men are cheating, and they pretend they don't care as long as he doesn't bring the drama home. The fact that there is even a stipulation indicates that they do indeed care. Of course, there are others who say, "I know my man is cheating, but I don't care because I'm cheating, too." There are even more sister-wives and brother-husbands that don't even know they have these in-laws. For the former two, the idea of a polygamous relationship may not be such a bad idea. The latter might leave the situation if they knew about it.
Regardless of the outcome, honesty is always best. It prevents a lot of pain, and the number of people who are accepting of "taboo" behavior is increasing by the minute. A popular statement is, "Tell me the truth, and let me decide what I want to do." With this in mind, if polygamy was legal, how would you respond if your partner came to you and said, "I think we should get married, but I also want to marry _____,?" Do you think you could present such an idea to your partner? We all know we're living in a day and age where couples are already inviting other people into their beds. So, is the concept of a polygamous relationship too far-fetched? I don't think so.
In fact, there are numerous polygamists living in the United States, and not all of them are Mormon.