9 Reasons Why Southern Christmases Are The Best
It's Christmas, y'all! To me, this is the best time of year. I LIVE for Christmas. I can't think of many things I'd change about Christmas here in the South. Sure--I'd love to trade tornado warnings for snow, but hey... I'll take what I can get. Southern Christmases are just better, and here are nine reasons why.
The food is better.
I'll put my Granny's cheesy potatoes against any bland Yankee b.s. any day of the week. It doesn't stop there, either: we got beans, greens, tomatoes, potatoes, chicken, ham, yams...
We know the right way to get into the "spirit" of the holidays.
Wassail? Nah. I'll take a Hotty Toddy made with some Blanton's. Y'all ever had a Lane Cake? We Southerners even put booze in the CAKE, people.
The fun lasts longer down here.
Some people up North put their Christmas trees up on Christmas Eve. What even? WHY? Why would you only want to enjoy your tree for literally ONE day? I know some good ol' boys who put their trees up on November 1st. That's living right.
Speaking of fun, we know how to have it.
What do Yankees do on Christmas? Caroling? Sit in an overstuffed chair and flip through the Williams-Sonoma catalog while chucking about your cousin Collins St. Clair's acceptance to boarding school in New Haven? HARD PASS. If you need me, I'll be out here riding four wheelers in the mud and doing some target practice with my Red Ryder BB Gun.
Our Christmas songs are better.
Listen to "Christmas in Dixie" or Otis Redding's "Merry Christmas, Baby" and then listen to "Christmas Shoes" and tell me which is better. NO CONTEST.
Our college football teams are superior to yours.
Literally one half of this year's College Football Playoff is comprised of teams from the SEC. Take that, Big Ten.
Yankees may have White Christmases, but we know how to chill.
Can you imagine going to some stuffy formal dinner in a drafty Hamptons mansion where everyone is wearing itchy sweaters and tartan scarves while they talk about stocks and bonds and fox hunting? NO THANKS, PAL. I'll keep Christmas with my momma 'n 'em where I can wear my stretchy pants and eat seconds of cheesy potatoes barefoot in the kitchen while my cousins and I discuss how Bama needs to RUN THE DANG BALL.
We're laid back, but we can show out, too.
You ever been to a Christmas service at a Southern church? The ladies are decked out and the kids are in dresses starchy enough to ruin a low-carb diet. And there are houses around here with decorations so gorgeous they put Norman Rockwell paintings to shame. There's a reason it's called SOUTHERN Living magazine, okay?
It's easier to get to Grandma's house.
Never having a White Christmas kinda sucks, but on the other hand... you never have to worry about needing snow tires or a sleigh to get to Granny's. It's waaaaaay easier to travel down here (unless you have to get on I 20/59).