10 Reasons Why Tuscaloosa Girls Are The Greatest
Mike Ehrmann/Getty Images[/caption]Tuscaloosa is home to the Alabama Crimson Tide and the coolest girls on the planet. We've got ten reasons why Tuscaloosa girls are the greatest!
Tuscaloosa girls always look good—and this is no small accomplishment. You’ve got to fight cold rainy weather that makes your hair and skin super dry in the winter. Spring down here makes your allergies go totally crazy, so you have to figure out a way to hide your puffy eyes and a nose so red it makes Rudolph the Reindeer blush. And summer? Y’all, summer is brutal; it’s hot as all get out and humid, too—and that means every time you go outside your hair frizzes halfway to heaven and your makeup straight up slides off your face into a puddle of sweat. Looking good despite the cray cray climate seems like a Sisyphean task, but not for us Tuscaloosa girls. We’ve got it on lock and look good in the rain, snow, and blistering heat.
Tuscaloosa girls are part of the most loyal fan base in all of college football. We’re proud to support the Alabama Crimson Tide, and our loyalties extend far beyond the upper deck of Bryant-Denny. Tuscaloosa girls are friends, sisters, daughters, mothers, co-workers, and we’re the kind of women you can depend on no matter what.
You think wearing high heels to a football game is easy? You ask a man to walk six miles on stilettos on gameday, and he’d break down in tears before you made it to the Quad. Tuscaloosa girls never back down from a challenge. We know to weather any storm.
Tuscaloosa was forever changed by the April 27th tornado. We lost so many of our loved ones and saw hundreds of homes and businesses destroyed. We were there for our friends and neighbors in their time of need. Even though we experienced profound loss and heartache, we stood tall and worked to rebuild.
We took James Spann’s advice and made our severe weather plans. That’s why we’ve got backup batteries, bicycle helmets, and flashlights in the basement. We know how to plan for just about anything—whether it’s navigating byroads to stay off McFarland on a Friday afternoon or coordinating a tailgate buffet so decadent it would make Paula Deen blush. If you want something done (and done right!), you ask a Tuscaloosa girl. We got this!
In fact, we may ask YOU to shut up while we’re watching the game. Dudes think they know it all when it comes to football and they love to tease women for being clueless, but when it comes to Tuscaloosa girls, they better keep their mouths shut. We know what the ref is gonna call before that yellow flag is tossed, and we’re probably gonna be the first ones to shout RUN THE DANG BALL when the passing game is falling flat. If you want a nice, quiet girl to bring you drinks while you watch football, you should probably date outside the SEC—but if you want someone who is as passionate about the game as you, you can’t do any better than a Tuscaloosa girl.
If you want ribs, we know to take you to the OG Dreamland on Jug Factory. If you’re craving a steak, we’ll drive you out to Nick’s in the Sticks. Tuscaloosa girls know a place for every occasion—from the elegance of Evangeline’s to the comforting classics at the Waysider. Heck, we even know where to take you if you’ve got a hankering for hummus (Hooligan’s or Glorybound), dreaming of decadent desserts (DePalma’s), or just want a big glass of sweet tea (Taco Casa). We’re lucky that Tuscaloosa is home to so many incredible restaurants, and we t-Town girls have them memorized like the backs of our hands!
Tuscaloosa girls can drive in any kind of weather: sleet, snow, rain, wind—we can conquer it all. We know how to navigate the 78 million potholes on 359 and the daggum labyrinth of road construction on 20/59. Heck, we even know when to slow from 75 to 69 (right before the Mercedes exit!) when we’re coming back home from Birmingham. And let me tell y’all: if you can navigate McFarland on a gameday, you can handle anything, anyone, and any stress on the road.
There’s never a dull moment with a Tuscaloosa girl. We’ll bring you to a tricked-out tailgate and take you to watch the Tide roll. Tuscaloosa girls are up for whatever: concerts at our amazing amphitheater, watching the Blue Angels barrel roll at the Airshow, shopping for fresh produce at the RiverMarket, jumping, sliding, and bouncing at the Insane Inflatable 5K, dining and dishing at Bacon and Brewfest, admiring artisans at Kentuck, or watching the sun set on the Black Warrior from Manderson Landing. There’s never a dull moment when you’ve got a Tuscaloosa girl by your side.
Our hearts are full of L-O-V-E: We’ve got so many special people in our lives, and we love them all. We’ve got friends we consider family, and we look out for our neighbors like we do our own. We love our state. We love our city, and we love our team. Roll Tide!